Mixed Metaphors.1

I am starting a new occasional series to document my use of mixed metaphors, which especially amuses Stearns and Wystan, and is a great shortcoming in my use or abuse of the English language.

Today, I said to Wystan that I was "wide-eyed and bushy tailed"--("bright-eyed, Emily, it's bright-eyed," he responded).

When I was little, Stearns made fun of me constantly for a time because I said (when I was very angry at her), "Wake up and smell the roses!"